Life has changed so much. When you go through traumatic experiences that change your life, you can't help but to change. My thought process has changed so much I can't even begin to tell you. I have found that some things that I have believed once before, I don't believe in so much anymore. I have found that it is harder to feel emotion, and to enjoy time with my good ole friends and family. I don't want it to be like this, but it is. I don't mean to hurt them. I just have gone through so much and through that, I just feel inadequate around them. I can't really explain it.
Recently, my older sister has left for her mission and my brother returned from his mission. I am so happy for them both, yet, this has been extremely difficult. I have looked up to Katie all my life. I've always been able to count on her in everything. We would rarely ever get into fights and I guess you could say she was my constant in my life. It has been very difficult to adjust to her being gone. But she is happy with what she is doing, so that makes me happy. On the other hand, it has been great having Nathan home. I've missed him a lot.
It has been about a year and a half now since my last concussion. Recently, I've been having some rough days with my head. So we set up an appointment to see this headache specialist. He said that is was migraines. My parents and I have been told that it is migraines for a while now and just didn't believe any of the doctors. But we decided to try the medicine that he suggest to see if that would help and if I was really having migraines. After a couple of days, I could tell a huge difference. I can't tell you of how much of a relief that was. It actually ended up being migraines and that was a complete shock for my parents and I.
School. School is almost done with for the year and I cannot wait. I have made it through a whole school year and that has been awesome to know. During this year though, I have missed a lot of school due to my migraines. For that reason, it has been difficult to stay caught up with school so my grades have been lower than I would like. It is difficult. While all of my friends are being "normal teens," If I stay out past 9, the next day I am not doing so well. I have to limit myself to what I can and cannot do.I started to teach piano lessons and that has been great. I love being able to help my students develop a talent that I know has blessed me through my life. If you're interested, let me know.
Next school year, I am planning on attending a charter school. I will only have to attend in person once a week. The rest will be through online. This will be better because on days that I am not doing to well, I will not have a lot of work to catch up on. I will also be able to take honor classes, fix some grades from this past couple of years, and graduate with an honors diploma. This is awesome. I did not think that I would be able to take honor classes again yet graduate with an honors diploma. For the social aspect, they have dances and all of that jazz. I am excited.
This past year has not been easy at all but with time, it is getting better. I just can not wait to see how much better I will be in a year or so. As I reflect back, High school was and isn't all that I thought it would be. Unfortunately, that is not a good thing. I just cannot wait to get done with this chapter in my life because it has been torture for me. Don't get me wrong, I have learned a lot that an average human does not know but it has been painful. I'm hoping my next chapter will be significantly different and better.
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